A fine romance my friend this is

We should be like a couple of hot tomatoes

But you're as cold as yesterday's mashed potatoes

A fine romance you won't nestle

A fine romance you won't wrestle

I might as well play bridge with my old maid aunt

I haven't got a chance

This is a fine romance

A fine romance with no kisses

A fine romance my friend this is

We two should be like clams in a dish of chatter

But we just fizz like parts of a setless powder

A fine romance with no clinches

A fine romance with no pinches

You're just as hard to land as the Ile De France

I haven't got a chance

This is a fine romance